Legend of the Eighth Unwanted Hero – Chapter 12: Things a Man Should Never Do With Women

My biggest mistake since bringing on companions was going shopping with them. Each of them were allotted one gold coin for clothing, and other necessary items. I didn’t get into specifics solely because I wasn’t comfortable discussing them in public. The business we stopped at was a clothing store. Looking at the prices on things I wasn’t sure how expensive things were. I hadn’t learned the value of each level of money so now was the best crash course possible to learn.

“Okay, can either of you explain how the money system in this world works?”, I asked.

“Oh right!”, Esmeralda said turning around while holding panties, “You don’t know that stuff, do you?”

“That’s why I am asking?”, I said looking away.

“The money system is as follows: 10 iron coins equals a copper coin, 10 coppers equals a big copper coin, 50 big copper coins equals one silver coin, and 50 silver equals 1 gold coin.”, Garmella said, “There are a few coins of higher value, but they can only be used in specific shops. This makes it easier for most businesses to keep change on hand. On this continent though money starts at big copper coins, and goes up from there. I gave you the full spectrum in case we leave the continent.”

“Or the planet…”, I said, “You guys have wrecked spaceships here.”

“There is a reason for that, but now isn’t the time to discuss that.”, Esmeralda said.

I nodded keeping mental notes of everything. While the two women went off to look at clothing I took Fauna to the children’s area to look for clothes her size. She was amazed by all the different colors, and patterns on the dresses. When I asked which one’s she wanted to try on she hesitated.

“I don’t have money.”, she said shyly.

“Don’t worry about that right now. We can’t have you wearing rags now can we.”, I said patting her head, “Pick out three dresses, a pair of sandals, a set of pajamas, and three sets of panties.”

She nodded looking at all the dresses. I got one of the workers to help size her so we knew what size she needed. She ended up selecting a light blue dress, a yellow spotted dress, and a frilly white dress. The panties she picked matched the print on the dresses which wasn’t all to surprising. She found a blue pair of pajama’s with yellow stars sewn on them which she really seemed to like. As for the saddles she picked out a pair of hiking sandals which was a good choice since we would be on the road. In all, her goods equalled 25 silver so the price was in acceptable range. The other two though selected more showy clothing, and they ended up paying for it. They both spent their entire alloted money on clothing items alone.

When the three asked if I was going to get clothing I shook my head saying the clothes I had were fine. That didn’t sit well with the three of them so I was forced into a men’s clothing store. Looking around everything was to fancy for my taste so I asked if they had any more casual clothing. The shopkeeper took me back into the store where they had much more down to earth clothing. I thanked him, and decided maybe a new pair of clothes was in order. I browsed their inventory selecting a pair of black slacks, a light blue t-shirt, and a brown duster that looked like it came out of an old west movie. Looking at myself in the mirror the look didn’t suit me. I changed my slacks to Khaki pants which looked a hell of a lot better. In addition, the canvas used would provide a bit more protection as it was far more durable. I picked out a of turtle shell boots that looked almost like a steel toe boot had been shoved in cowboy boots. The price was good, and it would protect me feet far better than my tennis shoes. Paying for the goods I walked out in my new clothing which the girls thought suited me nicely.

“How much was your stuff?”, they asked.

“Unlike you two I am a bargain shopper. All of this was only 18 silver coins.”, I said, “I managed to haggle him down to 15 silver though in the end.”

Both women puffed their cheeks out in displeasure, but Fauna seemed happy. I patted her on the head again asking if she was hungry. Quickly nodding I suggested we head back to the inn for our late lunch. Arriving back at the inn we stowed our bags up in our room before coming down for lunch. I asked the innkeeper if I had to add the young girl to our room price he shook his head.

“We can make an exception for a small child like her.”, he said with a warm smile.

The innkeeper didn’t seem to hold any ill will to other races which was a relief. We went to sit down as our lunch was brought out to us. Fauna and I shared a slightly large portion together making the two women glare at me. Fauna was very happy to be eating yummy food for the first time, but as a child there was always a catch. I ended up feeding her because she asked me too with her big cow eyes. I couldn’t say no so I feed her with my spoon. Both women watched the whole thing with displeasure apparently out of some sort of jealousy. I just chalked Fauna behaviour to a child wanting to be spoiled, and given her life beforehand I had no issue spoiling her to a point.

After lunch we decided that we needed some bathing supplies for the whole group. Currently we had been only using the cheap soap the inn had, but it really wasn’t meant for body wash. So we decided to go buy some soap, and shampoo for us to use. It took a while to track down, but we managed to find a General Goods Store in town. Bring the women with me to shop for normal items was another mistake because they had to browse every item in the store. I felt like I could have live my entire life here if the shop never closed.

“Can I help you find something?”, the old shopkeeper asked.

“Yes, we are looking for body soap as well as some shampoo.”, I stated.

“Oh, that is over in the hygiene section. Not sure why your companions think it is in the food section.”, he said a bit puzzled.

“Please don’t mind them. I am afraid I have lost them for the next several hours…”, I said with a sigh.

The old man laughed patting me on the back.

“Reminds me of when I was your age.”, he said showing me his stock, “I have several different scent you can choose from.”

I looked over the scents he had, and decided Lavender body soap was the best choice. As for shampoo I figured Honey scented shampoo would be the best plus it appeared to have olive oil in it which would be good for our hair. I paid him five silver for the items, and quickly rounded up the women to leave. When we got back to our room I started to smile because this was my chance to sneak a peek without feeling guilty.

All of us went into the bathroom together to bathe as a group. Neither women seemed to mind me following them which was a bit weird. I got the water warmed up for us filling the bathroom with nice hot steam. The girls entered into the room with Fauna sitting next to me. Fortunately the steam hid the big grin on face when Esmeralda’s boobs hit me. Fauna came to me so I could wash her hair for her since she couldn’t do it allow quite yet. Using the Honey scented shampoo I scrubbed her hair till it started to foam up. I then washed her tiny body with the Lavender soap covering her body in a slightly foamy suit. Dumping some water on her I rinsed her off before placing her in the tub. Turning to the two women I satisfied my male desires by washing them as well.

By the time I had finished I was thankful the steam hid my close partner in crime. As we climbed into the tub with Fauna who must have seen something in the steam. She squinted her eyes trying to see it, but couldn’t quite make it out.

“What is this?”, she said swinging at it.

The object she saw was a very sensitive organ on my body that as she smacked it caused me to collapse in pain. I rolled on the floor in pain making the women laugh at my pain. Fauna thought she has seriously hurt me, and went into a panic. I slowly sat up telling her that everything was fine, and that she should be more carefully from now on. Climbing into the tub to relax we all stretched out with sighs of relaxation from a long day of work. We lounged around for thirty minutes before getting out for bed. Our dinners were brought up to the room at my request, and not to long after we finished eating the four of us were sound asleep on the bed.

The next morning I found a red puff-ball on my chest. She was sound asleep sleeping peacefully with a pleasant smile on her face. The two beauties next to me were also smiling peacefully. Today we would relax, and buy the necessary supplies for the next leg of our journey. I started to relax again when I realized something extremely important…it was so important I felt terrible I hadn’t thought of it sooner.

“The hell is my goal in life now aside from enjoying myself?”, I thought with a puzzled expression.

I decided to ask the women what sounded like a good goal since I really had no goal. Being killed on Earth meant I couldn’t go home. I had no real reason to go after the one’s who threw me out of the castle so long as they left me alone. As far as I knew there was no real war going on at this time, and even if there was why the hell would I go fight in it. The only real objective I was given was by the herald, but even then I wasn’t sure if I really wanted to do that because I could end up making things worse for everyone. To fix the world meant turning it upside down, and thousands would perish if I did that. I wasn’t sure I could bear the weight of all those lives on my shoulders.

As I kept thinking the puff-ball woke up with a big yawn. She looked at me with her sleepy eyes before smiling at me. I patted her on the head which made her very happy. Sensing discontent from the other two women I patted their heads as well. The discontent subsided so I decided to ask everyone a goal that they wanted to achieve since I had none.

“Hmm…”, Esmeralda said thinking, “I think we should just wander around from place to place till something catches our attention. Maybe we could even become Legendary Rank Adventurers.”

“Oh! Tell me about that!”, I said getting interested in having the title Legendary.

“The Adventurers Guild is how almost all the most famous people in the world got to where they were now. Each did something thought impossible, but somehow managed to pull it off. I think it is the best place to start, and maybe find other goals along the way.”, Esmeralda said.

“Sounds like a plan to me. So where do we go to sign up?”, I asked.

“There is a guild hall in all the major cities so we can check out the one in town later today.”, Esmeralda said.

With a plan in place we got ready to move out for the day.

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